Well SCM, I was raised in a poor logging community by my parents. We lived hand to mouth, sometimes having to live in our families station wagon. I was very intelligent as a child and read voraciously. My school years were a tumultuous time, as I being undersized for my age, as well as being a far more gifted student then my peers was bullied and made a socially outcast. I found solace in art and music by my teens, and at one times had dreams of being an illustrator or a sequential artist. I hit a growth spurt when I was 15 and without the constant threat of fellow students I began become more public in my displays of rebellion. I unconsciously began to take on the stereotype of the young rebel. I fought constantly, drank like a fish and generally caused trouble. When I turned 18, without a diploma I moved to the nearest university town, where I survived by picking up odd jobs and couch surfing with people I had met. I eventually found fire fighting and discovered that I had a natural gift for reading the topography and atmospheric conditions of a forest. I branched into disaster relief as well, and worked without break for the next four years. I lived out of a line pack, had no relations, no friends, and no hobbies, so my bank account began to fill at a rapid rate. My first mental breakdown occurred after a series of incidents where I was injured and continued to work excessive hours with what was most likely serious head trauma. My breakdown was quick and completely debilitating. Deciding that I was in need of time off to recover, so I purchased a farm. My time on the farm was frustrating, I was used to the constant need to be aware at all times, as well as the physical labor and long hours. To calm myself I began drinking heavily. The effects of the free time and the alcohol resulted in a depression that I still experiance to this day. I decided in late 04 to purchase a computer and gain internet access to see what this whole internet thing was. The next and current phase of my life, is defined by you Cracky. I stumbled across your pictures and my life hasn't been the same since. The last few years I have been teetering in between normality and insanity, with a gradual shift towards a shared perception of reality. I guess in a way I think of you SCM as cracky, but in another way, you are a reminder of some sort of good that I need to find in my life. Anyways I sort of lost track of my thoughts there. What I mean is the me now, is a different person then the me before you. Your influence, has made me a better person in many respects, and has inspired me to try and be the man I know I can be, if I learn to control the part of my mind that wants to destroy me. Thank you for giving a face to my conscience. I wish I could do something to help you through what ever is troubling you, but any help form us would be water from a poison well. I just hope that you have helped make someones life better.