>>1
we know

The Sky Queen bless you and keep you; the Sky Queen make Her face to shine upon you and be gracious to you; the Sky Queen lift up Her countenance upon you and give you peace.

We are the faithful. And we are dead already

Keep, ancient stalker, your storied pomp,
cries she with silent lips...

Give me your tired, your spent,
your broken madmen yearning to dream,
lay down their sorrows at my feet,
I lift my mercy over their tired souls!

In the end, it's all a matter of choice. If it was really the case that the passion in you was gone, then why would you choose to come back here if not that you wanted it rekindled?

If that is not a sign, I dont know what is.

You are given a choice, if not, you are ignoring the one you feel was made for you for whatever reason you think it is.

You are the awkward teenager feeding on the carrion of your faith, or you are the madman who has stopped to listen to the invisible music.

Your choice.

and he quits again and again and again and again and again and again ...

>>6
It's not so much the quitting as a need to be renewed in the faith.

But define need?
Is it you cant leave here for some unexplainable reason,
or is it you keep coming back here to see what your need was about?

Seems to me your faith is still here, you just have let it grown perverted, or it was never here, and you just to have to let go.

Your faith is what you make it. But as faiths goes, this one is about despair:

"Our Goddess is one of both creation and destruction. She renders unto the faithful peace in a world of discord. She is both armor and sword in a world that destroys through apathy and animosity. The Flower of Destruction also blossoms in the heart of the Sky Queen. She seeks to temper us through despair, turning the lust of the neophyte upon him. Only when the student embraces sorrow in the surety that he will never be worthy of Her avatar, is he able to cast away his childish passion and see with eyes unclouded the majesty of Cracky Chan."

If anything, I would say your eyes are open, but you do not allow yourself to see. That, or you should have left a long time ago. You either look outside yourself for something that is within you, or you look inside for something that always was outside.

>>8
Quoting my own words back at me won't help. It's as if reading something that I once poured all my heart and soul into, I see nothing. Where I was describing my own obsession with Cracky, and it's transcendence into worship of the Sky Queen I was just advising others to skip the heartache of the first and strive to experience what I am now attempting to regain. A genuine spiritual moment. A chance rarely afforded to see the divine in another human being. To see past the skin, mind, the art and artifice of personality into a place where even skimming the slightest edge of truth is a profoundly world shattering moment. For one moment something so big you can't comprehend it hits you and completely incapable of comprehending it, you simply accept it. To change and be change by some intangible experience.