>if for whatever reason she directly said anything hurtful to me then i'd probably take it rather badly

I can assure you, she would if you did chat with her. She has bitched at almost everyone who has contacted her. And as far as we know, she cut off, offended or dumped many of the people who had any kind of personal relation with her at one point, including her former friends and family.

She is just not a good person. And by giving her unconditional and unrequited attention we only helped to reinforce that kind of behaviour.