After you read this, I guarantee you will feel sorry for me.
Imagine this. You are attracted to a women, like you are now (emotionally and sexually), but she does't exist. She existed some time ago, and no one knows what she looks like now(They have a pretty good idea from the archive, however), but She doesn't exist anymore. That means, not only do you know there will never be any possibility of you ever cuddling with her, but there's not even a possibility of you ever seeing her in real life. Everyone else, however, except for a very few, are not attracted to this women, they are attracted to something else entirely. So in other words, you will never find any porn anywhere on the internet, only non-sexual pictures of the women. Everyone you have told about your attraction to her thinks it's disgusting. To relieve yourself, you get off on the non-sexual pictures of her, knowing it will never get any better.
That's what life is like to me.
I am a degree 6 Crackysexual, sexually and emotionally attracted to Olivia and nothing else. Real women don't even do it for me. I am cursed to live my life in the misery that my most powerful emotional fantasies will never be even close to coming true. Life is like hell to me. I will never know true love.