''How To Prepare Cracky:''
Ingredients:
1 cup olive oil
1 stick butter
Hemp twine
Somethings to stuff her with
Instructions:
*Gently remove Cracky's wrappings
*Carefully wash all of Cracky's openings and cavities
*Smear butter under Cracky's breast skin
*Smear more butter between Cracky's thighs
*Massage oil all over Cracky
*Stuff Cracky until she's completely full
*Sew Cracky shut.
*Bind Cracky's thighs
*Cover Cracky in foil
*Bake Cracky at 350F for about 2000 minutes.
*When you insert a probe into the deepest, thickest parts of Cracky it should read at least 160.
*Baste only if it please you.
If you do it right Cracky will always come out better than turkey. Bon Apetit!