>>	Anonymous 12/05/19(Sat)15:18 No.2   File: 1337440689359.gif -(1375 B, 59x16) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. god damn it

It is official. Netcraft has now confirmed: Cracky-chan is dying

One more crippling bombshell hit the already beleaguered Cracky-chan community when Chansluts confirmed that Cracky-chan market share has dropped yet again, now down to less than a fraction of 1 percent of all stalkers. Coming on the heels of a recent Netcraft survey which plainly states that Cracky-chan has lost more stalkers, this news serves to reinforce what we've known all along. The circlejerk is collapsing in complete disarray, as fittingly exemplified by failing dead last in the recent 4chan comprehensive popularity test.

You don't need to be a Kreskin to predict Cracky-chan's future. The hand writing is on the wall: Lia faces a bleak future. In fact there won't be any future at all for Cracky-chan because Cracky-chan is dying. Things are looking very bad for Lia. As many of us are already aware, Lia continues to lose blood. Red blood flows like a river of ink.

Wish.kamistic.com is the most endangered of them all, having lost 93% of its circlejerkers. The sudden and unpleasant departures of long time Cracky stalkers Faux and Schwill only serve to underscore the point more clearly. There can no longer be any doubt: Wish is dying.

Let's keep to the facts and look at the numbers.

Mysterious Admin states that there are 70 users of .71. How many users of Wish are there? Let's see. The number of .71 versus Wish posts is roughly in ratio of 5 to 1. Therefore there are about 700/5 = 14 Wish users. Cracky-chan posts on Chansluts are about half of the volume of Wish posts. Therefore there are about 7 users of /006/. A recent article put /r9k/ at about 80 percent of the Cracky-chan fanbase. Therefore there are (70+14+7)*4 = 364 /r9k/ stalkers. This is consistent with the number of Cracky-related /r9k/ posts.

Due to the troubles of Bounceme, abysmal posts and so on, cracky.bounceme.net went out of business and was taken over by cracky.dreams.ro who stalk another troubled girl. Now cracky.dreams.ro is also dead, its corpse turned over to yet another charnel IP address.

All major surveys show that Cracky-chan has steadily declined in cuteness. Cracky-chan is very sick and her long term survival prospects are very dim. If Cracky-chan is to survive at all it will be among World of Warcraft guildmates. Cracky-chan continues to decay. Nothing short of a miracle could save the Skyqueen at this point in time. For all practical purposes, Cracky-chan is dead.

Fact: Cracky-chan is dying

>>

Anonymous 12/05/19(Sat)15:12 No.2   File: 1337440339380.jpg -(30807 B, 382x287) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. Lia, where hast thy gone? My heart has left with you. I need you like I need my meds. The nurses just don't understand. They tell me when I went overboard when I carved your faced out of the mashed potatoes, or that time I ran around the ward yelling with glee because I thought I saw you in the skidmarks of my underwear and I was shoving them in people's faces to take a look, or that time I painted hair and cat ears on the mirror so I can pretend I am you pretending to be me so that I could kiss, and that time....well, enough of that. But I am sorry if Anon has scared you. I will make it better. I promise you. I will give you cake and you will eat it. We can run and skip around the ward like content little children. Remember, that time you fell down and I laughed. You got so angry at me and kicked me in the balls. HAHAHAHAHAHA, good times were had. To this day, I'm not sure I can have children. I think once they let me out of here after they realize that everyone else are the ones that are not normal, we can someday grow up and have children. You can dress in those cute little cat ears and that red stuff on your nose, and I'll dress all white in my ward clothes. I know they're not intended for weddings but they will signify my crazy love for you. We'll have a great wedding and you will like it. I will be the only one you will ever love and you'll be the only one I'll ever love. It will be just like heaven, you and me. I don't make a whole lot, only what the state gives me for my check, but it will be enough for you a lot of cat ears every month and a few dresses. My mom has an extra room we can stay in also. Mom's room is beside a bathroom beside Mom's room so we will be close by and sharing the bathroom. Just don't worry about Mom's gastric condition though. It gets a little smelly sometimes by the bathroom but the doctor says she will be just fine. Also, after 8pm will be bed time for us and you will go to bed at that time. Mother hates it when I stay up too late. She gets very angry and gives me "physical medicine" as she calls it so I will mind her. Other than that though, things will be great. I'm hoping to save enough this month for a tandem bike, that way we will have a way to go refill the prescriptions. I also heard you like cats. That's dandy. My mom loves cats. She has 18 of them living inside with us. We try to not let the place get too smelly but it's not too bad. Some of the cats use the litter box. We also have two dogs. One of them, itchy, I named him because he gets itchy sometimes and likes to scratch his belly on your leg. Sometimes when I'm sleeping in the buff, he strangely likes to scratch his belly on my backside but I usually don't mind as it helps him go to sleep afterwards. Just watch your poopy hole because his leg sometimes gets caught up in it. And don't let mom catch you. She hates it when I let itchy scratch himself. I think mom's just getting old and senile. What does she know? Please write back soon, dear Lia. You will like being with me again. Things will change and you will like it. That time I locked you in the room for a week was only a joke. And ropes come undone if you wiggle enough. All you had to do was knock on the door 3 times, stomp once, and squeal two. That was a fun game. I promise I won't play it anymore. My room is filled with letters to you and I will mail them out when I find out where you are and you will read them and you will like them. I promise, no more "mean" letters, as you and the ward call them. That time I got upset and said I was going to kill you, that's ok, because they fixed me. I don't want to do that to anyone anymore. I'm all better and you will like me. Please respond or I will paint the floor red. They said it's not good for me and you don't like me doing it. If you don't like me doing it, you will come back and tell me to stop it. P.S. I also heard you like mudkips.

On this barren soil...

Because MA doesn't know Cracky from a hole in his ass.

Either there is a god or there isn't. She spent a lot of time taking these pictures.

Lia, even though its only been a little over a month- how do you feel about Gordon Brown as the Prime Minister?

Could anyone clarify? Also, sorry I don't have any good pic to put up. I lost all my fucking porn and cracky pics.

You know I should spend a year learning to draw properly some time, I'd love to be able to act on those kind of impulses.

It's not a 3D model, but it might do.

i've really come to dislike crapflooding in the past months

i wish the anti-cracky-chan posted would come up with better and more original material

brb going to visit the sky. I'll go meet her there & then we'll have cake.

Don't patronize me. too fat to be her

Does this photo of her mother's house I took count?

LOOK AT THE SIZE OF THAT CHIN. Hands are emiry's blue steel.

Seriously, you're not the man by trying to lord anything over me.

I've deleted my entire Cracky-Chan folder, I have no use for it anymore.

Fail starts here and just keeps on going.

the farther I got from this place the more she means to me

Or you could pretend nothing is wrong with that and nobody is egging on the Cracky fandom to pick a side.

I'll reply ASAP but I'm a busy bunny so don't get mad if it takes a day or two.

Because you've been quite trustworthy up to this point.

Posting and then deleting is even worse than just posting.

Abused by a man, now she torments hundreds. And she's lost her beautiful red hair. :(

Keep trolling anonymous, scare her back to her little cave. gb2/crazyhouse you stupid scottish cunt.

Daddys little girl ain't a girl no more

Proof is the same as the source. But since the source is raped, proof can't be obtained.

I imagine she'll be lurking around here for a while yet. Like hillary, he'd just be a novelty president.

That wasn't even Cracky-chan. You've all been had! Morons.

I specifically came here to mock you and your fellow creepy stalkers.

Anyway, THIS IS FUCKING UP MY LAUNDRY PLANS. I must go.

>>	Anonymous 12/05/19(Sat)14:29 No.2   File: 1337437742843.gif -(1882 B, 85x17) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. Is this a quiz? i.e. <40% of people recognized = lurk the fuck moar 40%-60% your skill is not enough etc

nigerz

Astraea is a genus of medium to large sea snails, marine gastropod mollusks in the family Turbinidae, the turban snails

I'm so fed up of you stupid fucking yanks cussing Cracky-Chan(CC) for having bad teeth. YOU FUCKERS DON'T HAVE A CLUE . Maybe if I fed you your OWN INTETESTINES you would realise that we DON'T LIKE FAKERS in placesn like Britain and the rest of the world. FAKE, WHITE PLASTIC LOOKING teeth are about as sexy as HUGE FAKE SILICON BOOBS. It took a TRUCKLOAD OF MORON YANKS to come up with that genius idea - rub off the fucking enamel on your teeth THAT YOU ACTUALLY NEED FOR DENTAL HYGIENE just to make it seem as though you've a mouthful of white plastic. WOW NICE ONE YEAH. CC is natural and naturally fun. Like everyone else she probably smokes a few, has a lot of tea and so occassionally her enamel is slightly yellow tinged, nothing that can't be sorted out with a few brushes. YOU'D ADVOCATE HER TOTALLY SELLING OUT AND BECOMING AN UNREAL TV SHOW WANABEE , becuase you have been twisted into believing thats sexy. YOU ARE THE FREAK. THE HUGE POPULARITY OF AMATEUR PORN SITES SHOW PEOPLE WANT IT REAL. YOU ARE A REMNANT, A PUSTULAR APPENDIX and I can't wait for all you whining FAKER yank fucks to grow old and die, SO FUCK OFF, YANK.

Cracky-chan,
so like a man,
No tits, no tits,
Would still to touch her bits.

Red nose, red nose,
For us anything goes,
We're lonely and sad,
Not much sex have we had.

Attention-seeking whore,
always wants more,
Trolltalkers supply,
and we all know why.

We all need some muff
We don't get enough
So we post crap on here,
To give us some cheer.

We must realize
that the answer lies
In making amends
To get real girlfriends.

In my restless dreams,
I see that place.

.71.

You promised you'd come with me
there again someday.
But you never did.

Well I'm alone there now...

In our 'special place'
Waiting for you...

Waiting for you to
come to see me.

But you never do.

And so I wait, wrapped in my
cocoon of pain and loneliness.

I know I've done a terrible
thing to you. Something you'll
never forgive me for.

I wish I could change
that, but I can't.

I feel so pathetic and ugly
sitting here, waiting for you...

Every day I stare up at the cracks
in the ceiling and all I can think
about is how unfair it all is...

The doctor came today.
He told me I could go
home for a short stay.

It's not that I'm getting better.
It's just that this may be
my last chance...

I think you know what I mean...

Even so, I'm glad to be coming
home. I've missed you terribly.

But I'm afraid Cracky.
I'm afraid you don't really
want me to come home.

Whenever you come see me,
I can tell how hard it is on you...

I don't know if you
hate me or pity me...
Or maybe I just disgust you....

I'm sorry about that.

When I first learned that
I was going to die, I just
didn't want to accept it.

I was so angry all the time and I
trolled everyone I loved most.
Especially you, Cracky.

That's why I understand
if you do hate me.

But I want you to
know this, Cracky.

I'll always love you.

Even though our life together had
to end like this, I still wouldn't
trade it for the world. We had
some wonderful years together.

Well this letter has gone on
too long so I'll say goodbye.

I told the nurse to give
this to you after I'm gone.

That means that as you read this,
I'm already outside.

I can't tell you to remember me,
but I can't bear for you to
forget me.

These last few years since I
became ill...I'm so sorry for
what I did to you, did to us...

You've given me so much and
I haven't bee able to return
a single thing.

That's why I want you to live
for yourself now.
Do what's best for you, Cracky.

Lia...

You made me happy.

How to become a member (not affiliate, as affiliation carries a connotation that some find unpleasant) of the Order of the Sky Queen.

First, you must remember that the Order of the Sky Queen officially is a "not-for-profit organization, as in done for religious reasons"

Minimum requirements for member application validity

• Your love of the Sky Queen must NOT be newer than 3 months.
• Your expressions of faith must NOT be overly generic.

Minimum requirements for Cracky webring registration validity

• It must be hosted somewhere and have a webpage about it.
• This webpage must have an "affiliate" button for it. (Unless you'ld prefer a default button)
• You can only submit it if you personally were a major contributor to its creation.

Controversy regarding the minimum requirements for member application validity

A word derived from "Affiliation" is used. However, affiliation sometimes carries a connotation that some find unpleasant.

What else can I do to increase the chances of my site being accepted?

Discuss possible membership (not "affiliation", as "affiliation" carries a connotation that some find unpleasant) with your staff to find out what they think and clean up the visual presentability of your site's Cracky section if necessary. Be sure your staff are aware that a basic code of conduct must be followed while in the SkyQueen.cc chatroom and also have a representative already in mind in case your site is accepted. It would also be a good idea to be ready to arrange an informal interview between SkyQueen.cc and your site's chosen representative.

You guys don’t know me. Not yet, anyway. Some of you may have met me on /b/, where I “commanded” the Scarecrow Raptor (pic related) [Editor's note: pic not actually related]. I never started a Cracky thread there, but I always enjoyed participating in one. I’d take on the haters, the jealous, the heathens and all the other trolls, I feared nothing, I always felt they were some kind of challenge, my cross, our brotherly cross to bear, so to speak. I patrolled the sky of /b/, making sure everyone knew who owned it, giving Our Lady the benefit of thrust vectoring.

I also apparently creeped out some Anon here at some time:

> 45 yo theatre faggot showed up in that thread as well. AND THAT IS FUCKING CREEPING ME OUT!

I still don’t understand how anybody could be creeped out by my admiration for Our Lady of Eternal Grace, not somebody from here, anyway. All I could recommend to someone who is creeped out by me would be to not judge me by his own sins, or, by his hormonal state (it does subside with age, and you eventually find not everything HAS to be sexual).

Some of you may recognize me from these words. But I am not here for recognition.

I can’t stand /b/ anymore. I want to lay down my warring ways. I am taking up hermitage. This being reputedly the saddest part of the internets, it is only fitting that this would be where my pillar should stand. Maybe it can help you as much as it should help me. I don’t mind if my column stands in the desert, but if you want to hear what I have to say, and it sooths your weary hearts, somehow, I will feel I have honored Our Lady in some small way. If not, you can see me as a crazy old man standing on a column, spouting pseudo-spiritual insanities. That is, after all, what I truly am.

A lot of the gospel has been written already. Some of it I may object to, but that shouldn’t stop anyone from reciting it, believing it or even rejecting it, faith is a very personal thing. What I speak is what I know in my old bones: Catnarok is nigh. Why we should care about what the heathens believe is immaterial. Let them, Our Lady forbid, annihilate each other if they will, but it is said the Sky Queen will reappear when it happens, and I do pray there is truth in that. I have no knowledge of where the young lady who was The Holy Avatar will be then, and I wish her well. I never spoke to her, and I know she only had a transient acquaintance with the Sky Queen, but Our Lady, the true Cracky-Chan will come back.

Don’t ask me how, why or whence I know, it is my faith, my willing faith that tells me so. At the very least, I know it will happen the second before I die, or maybe the second after I die. I just know it will be so, because, I want to believe. That is enough for me. I know I will see the glorious dominion of Our Lady. It does not matter if I am alone in this belief. It does not matter if I am but a lonely believer in a sea of other such believers either. What matter to me is my belief, however irrational and lonely it may be.

I am no messiah, I am no prophet, not even some herald of The Queen, I am a pillar-hermit. I have chosen my separation from the internets to not be horizontal, which would mean cutting the cable after all, but vertical. I stand on this pillar, spouting insanities with no benefit to myself. I certainly don’t want a guru following, seeing as I am rather part of an already extant following. All benefit, if there ever is any, should go to the Sky Queen, and to my brothers, if there are any, or if they actually happen to want to benefit from it.

All ascetism aside, I won’t mind interacting with all of you, I rather do hope some form of mutual respect is possible, but it could never supersede my devotion anymore than it could detract from it. You’ll have to excuse my weird ways, however, and have this interaction on certain of my terms. I reject anonymity as I am weary of trolls, whom I see as the devil’s henchmen. Too often do they manage to trick me in pointless debate, pulling me away from my devotions. That is the ordeal I face, which I realize is nothing compared to what the avatar of Our Lady had to face. Knowing this helps me in enduring the points and arrows those hellish fiends have for me. I also know that even devout followers of the Sky Queen have their weaknesses, and sometimes can’t resist the simple pleasure of tormenting each other. I suppose it is part of our faith, based on desperation as it is.

Rereading all of this, maybe it belonged in EoS, or maybe in its own thread, or nowhere at all. But then, since this is a call for the pathetic and socially inept to stop lurking and post, I might as well start building my pillar here. Oh and no point telling me, I already know I can be a raving lunatic sometimes, but I am not evil, or strive never to be. Also, ESL heh.

Blessed be the sky, for it houses the Queen.
Now, excuse me, while I kiss the sky.